So I'm 23 weeks now... and I'm getting more and more uncomfortable. But that's the joy of being pregnant right? I was talking to my sister in-law the other day about my birth plan and I feel a renewed sense of ability to follow through w/ what I had originally planned. It is probably one of the most frustrating things for me when I tell people that I don't want and epidural, and I don't want pitosin, but everyone says I'm crazy. It's especially frustrating and hurtful when I tell family about this and they are SO not on board w/ me. They say the words I want to hear, but they are NOT encouraging. It's kind of like the back handed compliment.Every time my natural birth comes up my mom will say things like, "you don't deal w/ pain very well". And here am I holding back wanting to say, "oh really? and you know this HOW? You know because you've felt EVERYTHING I've ever felt??" Just like this week. I am experiencing something all new w/ my pregnancy, daily pain... "down there"... It feels like I'm being kicked repeatedly in that area, and that my pelvic bones are going to break at any second. The pain is so bad that at times I can't even so much as move my legs while I'm laying down let alone walk, or get up from a sitting position. Thus relating me to having to start wearing a pregnancy belt. Which is something that supports the weight of the belly/baby.
I think Piper might be sitting really low and that's why I'm having these issues. But I still need to speak w/ my doctor about it. But my mom tells me when I'm describing my pain, "and you want a natural birth? You're complaining already about this pain, labor is going to be MUCH worse." My husband even gets in on the fun sometimes and tells me he totally is on board w/ the natural birth plan, and what ever I want he'll follow through with, even though he knows in the back of his mind that I'm going to ask for an epi, and/or I'll be screaming my brains out in pain.
Listen... I know from all the research I have done, and all the people I have spoken w/ that labor isn't a walk in the park. It's GOING to be painful. It's MEANT to hurt. I mean honestly... you can't think for one second that pushing a human body the size of a small watermelon through a tiny hole no bigger than your fist isn't going to hurt!! I may tear, I may have a hard time pushing her out, there are SO many things that could happen, and I don't need constant reminders every time this is brought up. My body was meant to have children and that's exactly what I plan on doing. NATURALLY. I feel like I have no support in this.
I am a pretty big baby when it comes to pain, but I loved my natural childbirth. There's a difference between pain that means something is wrong, (like a headache) and pain that comes from work, like childbirth or like when you work out really hard and your muscles are sore. Does that make sense? This afternoon I was having horrible stomach cramps, and even though they weren't as intense as some of those late surges during Carson's birth, they were irritating me more, because I wasn't getting anything out of them! In labor, the discomfort is worth it, because you get a sweet, healthy baby. :) So seriously, don't listen when people are doubting you. :)
ReplyDeleteI do strongly recommend though that you do some practice and preparation to make it a positive experience. You wouldn't just show up and run a marathon without doing some training, and I think natural childbirth is similar. You probably already know that I'm a HUGE fan of HypnoBirthing. You can buy the book and CD off of Amazon, but there aren't any classes in Wyoming. :( I know a couple of people who are big fans of Hypno Babies, and I believe they have a home study course. I also just bought a book that's been highly recommended to me and that I'm REALLY excited to read called "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth" by Ina May Gaskin. She doesn't present a specific method, but has lots of stories and information.
Good luck!